Monday, May 21, 2007

Love Music, Love Reading...then you should be seen at



The concept of having the first date in coffee shop always fascinated me. Girls were quick to point out the coffee shop allows a quick escape route from a date gone bad. Due to the proximity to NYC, I have had some interesting dates in Starbucks.

Let it be know, that I do not particularly like Starbucks. The reasons actually is quite simple and I couldn't have said it better than Denis Leary whom I quote "Coffee doesn't need a menu it needs a cup".

So here is the sneak peek at what happened on this particular date.

Girl: Hi, I am ____________
Uber: Glad to finally meet.(Insert a joke)
Girl: (Akward laugh)
Uber: How about we get something to drink first

So I walk up to the counter to order what I thought was going to be as easy as A,B,C...(damn I know have that tune in my head)

Uber: "One small regular coffee please and..." looks at the girl.

She steps forward with the confidence of a matador going into the ring

Girl: "I will have the grande vanilla hazelnut Kenyan blend coffee mocha with skim milk and a little powdered cinnamon on the top."

I was shocked and awed at this order and how she never though twice about ordering this. (This was the look Bush and company I believe were hoping to get from insurgents in Iraq)

Starbuck Stuck up Coffee Server: "OK and you..." looking down at me with contempt, "...wanted regular coffee. What size grande, venti,..."

Uber: "Err..the normal size would be fine."Should I have learnt Latin in high school

Obviously I have caused much embarrassment to my date and so she steps in front of me and using the Starbucks lingo gets my small regular coffee. And effectively deflates my ego.

SSCS: "Anything else".

She was looking at my date when asking this because she knew I was a lost cause

Girl: "Get a couple of muffins, cookies and..."

I just stood in the sidelines and watched in amazement. Now I can empathize with mortal when they watch Tiger Woods, Roger Federar, Michael Jordan play their sport at a different level

The tab comes and being a gentleman I volunteer to pick to up. My date doesn't even make a feeble attempt of trying to pay like fumbling with her purse. I saw the bill put back the $20 and took out my credit card. I would have been cheaper to have this date a restaurant where they actually serve you.

Girl: "You are not a big fan of Starbucks."
Uber: "So what gave it way?"
Girl: "Really. See I thought you like to read , listen to music and love coffee. Starbucks should be your comfort zone I wold think"

I agree on the reading and listening to music part. I remember telling her that I love to sit in a coffee shop. I do not ever recall telling her I love Starbucks. Why did she assume I love Starbucks. I am not a hippie, do not write haiku...

Needless to say this was the only date I had with her. Sometimes when I pass Starbucks I wonder, what my life would have turned out if I had taken time to learn the Starbucks way.

But on the bright side I then wouldn't have a blog...

1 comment:

austentious said...

This was truly hilarious.